Wow, it seems like it’s been forever since I’ve posted something new.
Since I last updated I:
Tore up the hookah bar with Dance Group for our afterparty.
Semi-picked up smoking again (lame.)
Broke my laptop? I’m not entirely sure what happened, but it totally and -far as I can tell- randomly dies when I’m online and is a fucking useless plastic box for 20 minutes before I can turn it back on.
Read 3 books during the times that my laptop was out of commission.
Got a Twitter account- see my new sidebar thing!
Slept funny on my antitragus piercing and it still hurts.
Ordered food every night, and am therefore much poorer, but it doesn’t stop me from probably getting wings tonight. In my defense, they are delicious and I can’t get them at home.
Called my Dad to confirm that he was coming to take me home for the Summer. It’s always a hoot to talk to him. “You know I always say college is like a pizza: each semester is a slice and it goes by fast!”
Freshman Buddy and I are at a strange place. We didn’t see or speak to each other for a few days after we had sex, which is super-weird because a) we usually hang out all the time. b) we had sex for his first time, and while it wasn’t perfect, it still happened. c) he’s not just “some guy,” so I was expecting a little more emotional attachment from him.
Monday was the last day of classes, so we all celebrated accordingly through Tuesday night. Freshman Buddy tried to call it a night early, but I made him come back across campus to cuddle with me. (“Across campus” is basically a block; I’m not a total bitch.) We got to it. Now, I don’t know if I’m reading too much into this, as you all know I am wont to do, but this is how it went down:
JS: *during a blowjob break* Want me to get a condom?
Freshman Buddy: Only if you want it.
JS: Yes.
Freshman Buddy: Then yes.
To me, this means either he didn’t really want to, but since I did he was just going along with it (which is what I’m worried about with the telling each other we like each other thing, too) or he was being a nice guy and making sure we were both into it.
The next morning I was a complete crankypants and he left pretty fast. Before parting ways, and before I was awake enough to realize I was being a crankypants, we made out a little and he asked if I wanted to "do anything," but he had some crazy morning breath so I had to say no.
I was planning on having a chat with him to say that I wanted to let things go for the Summer and see where we are when we get back to school. But then I heard from JB that he’s saying that he doesn’t want to have sex for the rest of the school year (which is like, less than a week now) and she didn’t give me any reason why he would say that. She joked that I ravaged him and now he’s ruined, but I have no idea. This brings up a few problems. One- What did I do to him? Is this my fault? Two- I wanted to get good-n-laid a few more times before going home since home=no dudes. Who am I supposed to fuck now? It’ll have to be a no-strings guy since Freshman Buddy is apparently out of the picture. So Lipring? SS? Wtf??
JB, a Dance Group Freshman, Hot Lesbian, and I started drinking today at noon to celebrate the end of sit-down finals (I think we each only had one exam, but still) and were carrying on until 5. We went to dinner and it was naptime until about an hour ago. My mouth tastes disgusting because I smoked and didn’t brush my teeth before my nap. I’m probably going to be up all night being a spazz. Great.
6 comments:
hmm...I'm going to IM you to talk to you about this more in-depth.
see I didn't have to look up antitragus because you told us what it was the last time it was discussed here!
FB was probably being nice or timid. I mean I have never known a guy ever that didn;'t want to.
On the computer thing it sounds like it is getting hot, I had one like that and Office Depot sold me a fan thing that t sits on and that fixed me right up, maybe that wil help you.
Hope your summer break is a good one!
Did you get your laptop checked out? That sort of damage on your laptop suggests some sort of virus or spyware and not like, mechanical damage of any sort.
I say grab FB and have a sit down, with both of you sober and upright (having conversations with women in a bed or on a couch never works for me). Since you were his first he might be intimidated, so getting everything out in the open might help him.
I think that JB might be right.
A first time is a big thing for a lot of people ( even for guys,although they rarely admit it)
I think you might have intimidated him, it could also be that he wasn't entirely ready but didn't want to say no as to not seem like a wussy. He might be really confused and scared. Chances are it wasn't what he expected ( and by this I don't mean that the sex wasn't good or soemthing) But what I mean is that everyone has an imagination of their first time, maybe he invisioned it differently.
The fact that you are more experience than him probably scares him, also since you were on top it might feel to him that you are sexually completely in charge of him. Guys have a hard time dealing with women being sexually more "powerful" than them ( unless they are into that thing, but that usually comes when they are more experienced)
Maybe the fact that you told him to leave
My advice would be that if you want to preserve anything you have with him and or even just your freindship to cool thingsa off sexually. Just hang out with him casually instead, unless he initiates something himself.
sage: i think you're right with the overheating thing. since i'm a poor college kid i've macguyver'd a setup with my trashcan and the window that seems to keep things cool and it's been working out alright.
tf: this thing has antivirus software up the arse courtesy of my paranoid dad. and like i said to sage, trying to keep it cool has been working.
mnwhr: well, i sort of tried to do that...once i finish my final paper i'll write a post about it.
pink: he's been super-aloof, and saturday night prob didn't help. i just hope i get a chance to see him sober and normal before going home for the summer :/
Post a Comment