So Over It

Last night Capoeira Guy told me to call him when I was done with this little dance thing so that he and I could hang out. I wasn't really in the mood for him, but I figured I'd probably be able to get some food out of it so I gave him a ring. He picked me up and [strike 1] we drove around for OVER AN HOUR because he didn't think that places would be closed at 11 pm. On the drive [strike 2] he amused himself by asking me "probing questions" to try and "figure me out" since he's "usually a really good judge of character at first glance, but I can't figure you out." (Absurd since I wear my heart on my face and say what I mean.) We ended up just deciding to make pasta at his house and rented a movie. While we were watching [strike 3] he kept on hollering theories about how it was going to end. He also [strike 4] wouldn't stop saying things like "This is a really good movie" (Uh, I know, that's why I said "Oh, this is a really good movie; let's rent it").
Then we got another movie on demand and this is where it REALLY started to go downhill. Once he got the tv stuff all figured out he came back over to the couch and sat on me since I was stretched out over the whole couch.
Capoeira Guy: Hey, want to hear something funny?
JerseySjov: What?
CG: *farts ON ME* Hahaha!
JS: What the fuck? That was goddamn disgusting. What the fuck?
CG: Haha, you're not really mad. I'd know if you were really mad.
JS: I can't believe you just did that. That's fucking disgusting.
CG: Hahahahaha.
WHAT THE FUCK. HE'S 27 YEARS OLD AND WE'VE BEEN HOOKING UP FOR ONLY A MONTH. THAT IS NOT OKAY. IF YOU HAVE A MASTER'S DEGREE YOU SHOULD NOT DO THAT.
So then, in a very ill-advised attempt to get me back on his side, he literally poked me throughout the entirety of the second movie. At around 4 am, we went to bed. For some reason he thought it would be okay to try and hook up with me, rubbing all up on my boobs and ass. No, thank you. I told him I was cranky and tired and that he should roll over and go to sleep. He woke me up 20 minutes later to try again. Then again at 8 am to try again. The morning was the WORST since he was practically getting off rubbing himself against my ass crack while I was angrily pretending to be asleep. After far too long he got the picture and left me for a couple hours.
He woke me up yet again at noon. I jumped out of bed and started getting dressed, and he got in my face trying again to get some. I told him that I had rehearsal and he said, "I'll bring you home now, but you have to dress me." This request was most likely due to me zipping up Espada's jacket the past few practices for one reason or another [aka I like being around Espada more than I like being around Capoeira Guy despite my initial physical attraction to Capoeira Guy]. When I laughed in his face he changed it to "The price for me driving you home is showing me your boobs." I said that he'd seen them before and to just take me home already.
Thankfully both TA and JB called me on the ride back to the apartment so I didn't have to make small talk to Capoeira Guy.

I knew he was a little immature. I knew he talked a little too much. I knew he wasn't too quick on the uptake. But GODDAMN he couldn't have pissed me off more if he had tried from when he picked me up to when I practically tuck-and-rolled out of the car.
I'm So over it. Done.

*Hours-Later Edit*
Just got back from Lipring's where I had actual sexy sex since sexting/booty-texting/being booty-texted by him basically every weekend since October. Very pleased with self. Ahh.