My plan for last night was to vacuum my apartment, have a drink or two with the girls, and go to the hookah lounge.
What I actually did last night was pound a bottle of Big Red House by myself with the WASP and his roommates on their porch, say that I didn't want to go to a party because it was too far away, somehow end up at that party, saw the blond, told FREAKING EVERYBODY that I wanted to fuck the blond, played a spectacularly bad game of pong, then HAD SEX WITH THE BLOND.
I'M SO EXCITED. I sent an all-caps msn message to B earlier. Who knows where it's going or if it's going anywhere but holy shit it had been a while since I'd gotten any. My only regret is that I was pretty trashed [entire bottle of wine, remember] so I'm not entirely sure exactly how it happened, but it did happen. He's a nice cuddler in the morning. Hopefully I wasn't too too foolish [yeah, right, my middle name is foolish] so he'll talk to me ever again.
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6 comments:
Oh to be in college again. :( Be safe! God...that must sound as ridiculous as it did when I was in college.
The wine must not have thrown off your game too much, you ended your drought.
Man, you were really, really really excited to have sex with the blond!
My money says he'll talk to you again :)
All right! You bagged a blond. Explain the WASP to me again? I know that the band WASP was rumored to stand for We Are Sexual Perverts.
Anyway, congrats on getting some peen!
I'm doing a stand-up open mic in Chicago on Wednesday, and I'm basically going to just recount one of my old blogs about a one-nighter. Don't know why I'm telling you that cause Blond is no one-nighter if he was cuddling. Then again, I'm a bit of a cuddle whore.
tr: i'm all about safety! i have a big stash of new condoms that im excited to try out
mnwhr: haha, it does take extraordinary circumstances to throw off my game
tf: oh, he's sexy. anyone would be excited about it. plus, i was probably still drunk when i wrote this
heff: good guess
dr ken: White Anglo-Saxon Protestant. sometimes one-nighters cuddle; you can cuddle without commitment. thanks for the congrats.
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